Why do I look back every month?

For some time now, I have been in the habit of reviewing with my husband at the end of the month what has happened to me this month and why I am grateful to him.

I LIKE TO LIVE IN THE MOMENT, SO WHY DWELL ON THE PAST

Sometimes I wonder why I should look back when I like to live in the moment, and I love it when I think about the future.

And here is my ZATO

Because I can connect the dots, when I look back - Remember, Steve Jobs talked a lot about this, he said you can't connect the dots for the present or the future, but you can always connect them for the past.
So, you can almost always see, when you look back, why something bad or good happened in your life, so that you can be at the point you are today. 

Because I can always see progress when I look back - We change every day, we get to know each other better in our relationships, and the circumstances in which we live change.
EXAMPLE FROM LEGAL LIFE - I ask a person who is complaining about another person in a marriage: “Look back two years, see if your relationship has changed, what that person was like then.”

IF the person answers, “YES it has become “better”, but I would like it to stop... to become .... to help me more.”   

IN THIS CASE, GRATITUDE SHOULD BE SWITCHED ON

Yes, we are human beings, and we tend to grow, to improve, and that is why we want a better partner every day. Here it is appropriate to ask ourselves first of all whether I have become a better person in these two years, whether I am doing everything I ask of this person. When you open your heart, let gratitude in, take responsibility, then progress will continue, maybe not at the pace you want, but if you trust, progress will be visible.

IF the person answers: “NO it has become “worse”, no communication, the person is rude, ignores me, does everything his own way, doesn't look at my feelings...

IN THIS CASE, OPEN YOUR EYES AND STOP TORTURING YOURSELF

It's always hard to admit that you're not happy, that you're not content, that you're living in a relationship. When that happens, you always have the option of having another honest conversation with the person, which means throwing all your cards on the table and then trusting life to turn in the right direction. And then it is also important to look back and ask yourself: “Am I willing to waste another two years on a relationship where I'm really torturing myself?” If you are honest with yourself, the answer comes quickly and is always the right one.

AND WHAT OCTOBER 2024 HAS BROUGHT US THIS TIME

Peter in October, I am grateful to you:

For standing by me on a new project.

To always hold me.

To always kiss me.

To tell me that you love me.

To surprise me some mornings and make me coffee.

Yes, when I get home, I have a hot lunch waiting for me.

To call my daughter, to talk to her, means you love her.

To make time for our dates.

To bring our family together.

To remind me repeatedly what the meaning of life is.

Your Gregor

Gregor, I am grateful to you:

To step out of your comfort zone, to follow your dreams, to dare and take a new step.

That you laughed a lot.

For listening to me when I told you that maybe it was time to train. You came home as good as new.

To believe in yourself.

For telling us when we got on your nerves.

For telling me every day that you love me.

To hang up your clothes repeatedly.

To cook your lunch more than once.

That you went to the shop.

To take Val and Lili to training.

That you went for coffee with your mum and had a really honest conversation and were very happy to tell me about it.

For listening to me when I was having a hard time.

For listening to me when I disagreed with you.

That you praised Val and Lili when they cleaned the house.

That you danced with me.

That I am never taken for granted.

Your Petra

If that's not a great motivation, you should also start looking back at the past month.

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